The Pitch
by Ridel
Summary: Ridel Pitches her new fanfic to the Autobots who, having been in several franfics as of late, are less than enthusiastic in hearing her out.


**AN: 1**

Hello all. I'm relatively new to the Transformers fanfiction scene. So I'd like to apologize in advance if anyone is too OOC.

Basically I've wanted to try writing this TF fanfic for a long time now, but my Internal Editor (Whom I call Mrs. Farber) Won't let me. She seams to be a purist fan and has some very definite ideas about how the TF universe should work. I can't get two lines written without her making me delete them. Thus I can't even begin to explore the options my story presents me with. Or what it's like to write for the Autobots for that mater.

I was getting frustrated with Farber's emphatic opposition, so I figured I'd take my case to a hire power…

000

"I think all I need is some practice. So what do you say? Are you with me?"

The assembled Autobots voiced their opinions in varying levels of groan.

"How did you even get in here?" Asked Hotshot, truly baffled.

"Uh… look Ridel," Said Bumblebee kindly, putting a hand on the would be writers shoulder. "Things have just been a little… you know, hectic lately. What with the new movie coming out and raising transformers awareness, there have just been too many fics to keep up with."

"We're being run ragged!" Shouted Sideswipe.

"Haven't we been through enough torture?" Sunstreaker added.

Ridel looked crestfallen. "But… But I have all these cool and fun ideas!"

"Yes I've personally experienced you writers idea of 'fun.' It's painful and demeaning." Stated Ratchet, glaring sourly at Sunstreaker and Sideswipe for some reason.

"I don't mean a pointless humor fic!" said Ridel defensively. "I mean like, I have this kind of unfinished, unexplored idea for a whole new series. We could start the universe again from scratch and-"

Tracks raised a hand.

"uh, Yes?" said Ridel.

"This new story," he asked. "Will it involve hot human females falling head over heels in love with transformers?"

Ridel stared for a moment, then shook her head emphatically. "Oh no! I wasn't planning on anything like that!"

"Slag." Muttered tracks, snapping his fingers.

"Look," Said Jazz to the others. "We're probably going to be roped into some new fanfic soon anyway. So why don't we just hear the girl out. Maybe this'll be good."

The Autobots grumbled and griped in a "go ahead, tell me the worst." Sort of way.

Ridel blushed a little. She herself wasn't sure that the story could fly. How could she convince the Autobots to accept her idea?

She cleared her throat. "Well," she said, voice cracking. "I was watching headmasters you see."

"Aww slag." Said Billy, neigh Blaster.

"And well… Well I thought it was kind of cool how, erm… now that they could combine and fight and stuff, the humans weren't so totally useless."

"Hey!" Interrupted Sparkle, neigh Spike. Sideswipe snickered.

"S-so anyway. Then I was watching a bit of Armada and I thought, well the minicons kind of reminded me of the headmaster thing too. So I guess I thought, 'Hey,

What if, instead of Minicons, way way back in time the transformers already had some sort of head master arrangement with a humanoid species from a nearby planet? The machinery that allowed the humanoids to combine and fight was specially tailored to their species and they fought on both the Autobot and Decepticon sides."

Ridel was looking fixedly at the floor, Cheeks blazing, unable to meet anyone's gaze. She heard no response. She had their attention, but couldn't tell if this was a good thing or bad.

She coughed and continued.

"So anyway, after a while (just like the minicons) they were being used mainly as pawns, boosting the power of whoever happened to have one.

Finally they decided that enough was enough, and devised a way to escape the slavery and seemingly unending war."

"Somehow I don't think we would do that." Someone piped up. It sounded like Bumblebee. He was shushed.

"uh… So they made themselves a ship, loaded all the survivors of their race onboard, and scarpered. Leaving the Autobots and Decepticons notably weaker. of course the Decepticons tried to stop them and such, but they failed."

"Well that doesn't sound the least bit familiar." Interjected Hotshot sarcastically.

"Well… not to me it doesn't." argued Tracks, who had missed the whole headmasters and Armada series.

"So!" continued Ridel, figuring that she might as well finish her story since she'd gotten so far.

"The ship appears by a fairly primitive world, which would be earth, and they settle down there.

Uh, after a while they blend in with the locals, because I guess they look exactly like humans, and interbreeding happens and stuff. So the races intertwine and become the humans that we know today. Jump forward to the present."

"In their search for new sources of Energon, the Decepticons have stumbled across the Earth. In addition to being lousy with potential energy, they discover the discarded Humanoid… I need a name for them, ship."

"How come no humans ever discovered it?" Asked Spike.

Ridel looked up and scratched her head. "They… I don't know. We just didn't."

"Maybe it's buried or something." Said Hotshot.

"BLAM! But if it was buried how did the BOOM! Decepticons find it?" Asked Warpath. Inserting random sound affects wherever he saw fit.

"Maybe there was an energy signature they could trace?" Offered Bumblebee.

"But wouldn't the energy in the ship have dried up a long time ago?" countered Spike.

Bumblebee shrugged his shoulders. "After we landed on earth, we were deactivated for four million years, but our ship still had enough power to revive all of us, remember?"

"…Oh yeah, I guess it could work."

"You going to finish the story?" Blaster asked, addressing the little redheaded writer.

"Oh yeah well, Upon further examination the Decepticons make this important discovery."

"Someone's getting a raise." Said Hotshot.

"Some humans, not all, but some, have a biology close enough to those of their off world ancestors, that they are still compatible with the cybertronian systems. Things like type O blood, a slight deficiency in this, a tiny surplus of that. Largely irrelevant to any human ignorant to the alien presence… Which is pretty much everyone, except I guess for the poor guys who were abducted for the experimentation that led to the discovery."

A small silence settled over the room. After a while it was broken by Bumblebee.

"…And?" He asked.

Ridel blushed some more. "That's kind of all the actual story I have." She said bashfully.

"What, that's it?" Said Sideswipe incredulously.

"Well no not exactly, I mean, Obviously the Autobots hear about the discovery and come to earth to help stop the Decepticons. I know which characters I want to use, and who my OC will be and stuff. But I just don't really know where to take the story from there."

"What OC?" Asked Hotshot.

"Well," Ridel began. "she's-"

"Mary Sue!" Said Sideswipe rolling his optics.

"I beg your pardon?"

Sideswipe sighed. "The main character is a girl, and she's probably one of the people who can use the systems right?"

Ridel nodded mutely.

"A girl with a special power that makes her wanted by both the Autobots and Decepticons. Very original. Going to be a Mary Sue for sure."

"But you haven't even met her yet!" Whined Ridel petulantly.

"Don't have too." He said back, crossing his arms. "I've been in my share of fan fics believe me. She's either going to be annoyingly sarcastic or a soppy mess."

"Bet you a dollar she's not." Said Ridel annoyed.

Sideswipe raised an eye ridge. "Say what?"

"I bet you a dollar- no wait, fifty dollars that Sarah's not a Mary Sue. Or a Scary Sue either."

Sideswipe was about to reply when the huge doors behind them hissed open and Optimus Prime walked in, holding a pinched looking middle aged woman dressed in a pinstripe office suit in the crook of his arm. The woman looked like she was in heaven.

"Would anyone like to explain why this human was tied up and locked in storage bay nine?" He asked, scanning the room with disapproving optics.

"Aw nuts." Muttered Ridel and shuffled behind Blaster.

Mrs. Farber, Ridels internal editor, caught sight of the movement and pointed a vengeful finger in her direction.

"Over there!" She shouted. "It was that girl hiding behind Blasters leg! She attacked me, tied me up and shoved me in there for no reason!"

Blaster moved and left Ridel Exposed. She cringed as Optimus confronted her, clearly upset.

"Well?" He asked.

Ridel swallowed hard, but decided not to lie to him. "I uh… Well she's my editor and she wasn't going to let me pitch my story idea to the other Autobots."

"Please tell me you didn't. Tell me I'm not too late!" Pleaded Farber in despair.

"Oh but she has." Said sideswipe mischievously. "We were just about to vote on whether or not we should do the fic."

Mrs. Farber slapped her hands over her eyes and groaned. "You stupid kid." She addressed Ridel. "You have absolutely nothing to go on! How can you write a story if you don't know how to end it?"

"That's how I wrote my NaNoWriMo novel." Said Ridel peeved.

"And?" prompted Farber.

"…Okay so it was pretty bad."

"Pretty bad!?" She shouted, leaning over and almost falling out of her perch. "Only Pretty bad? Without me you couldn't write a grocery list! Let alone a novel. And yet you insist on getting rid of me when writing. I will not allow you to write fanfic about the Autobots. I'm sorry, but your skills with the pen are just to-"

Bumblebee, who had been talking with spike, raised a hand. "Hey uh, I don't know about you guys, but Spike and I'd be willing to give it a try. I mean, as long as it's not another slash fic I'm okay with helping Ridel figure it out."

Ridel and Farber gaped.

"You are?" Asked Farber incredulasly.

"You will?" asked Ridel, feeling elated.

"Well BLAM why not? I wouldn't mind a KABLOOIE Cameo every once in a while myself." Warpath joined in.

"It sounds like it'll fall flat." Said Hotshot, causing Ridel to deflate a little.

"But I don't know. I guess it's worth a try anyway. If it dies, I can always sign on to someone else's fic."

Ridel punched the air. "YES!" she shouted, triumphantly.

"I've heard worse Retellings." Said Jazz from where he was lounging against a wall. "Slag, I've been IN worse retellings. Maybe it'll work and maybe it won't. We'll just have to see won't we? Count me in."

Sideswipe shook his head. "No way. For once, count me out. I've had more than enough stereotypical Mary Super girl fan fiction for a life time."

"Sarah's not a Mary Super girl." Said Ridel exasperatedly.

"Yeah? Show me a few chapters of this thing and tell me otherwise."

"… Is that permission to write this fic then?" Asked Ridel hopefully.

"Just a minute," said Prime. "What exactly is this story you're arguing about?"

Mrs. Farber seamed to get her voice back. "It's stupid. You really don't want to be in it! Really!" She blurted out hurriedly.

"Well you see," Started Bumblebee "It's sort of-"

"Stupid." Interrupted Farber. "Just really, really stupid."

Optimus raised an eye ridge and gently placed the pinched woman on the ground. "Go on Bumblebee." He said.

Bumblebee went on to relate Ridel's tenuous plot, with several interjections from the other Autobots and the writer herself. At length They finished and Optimus gave his verdict.

"Men, when I stumbled across Mrs. Farber I was already on my way up here with three writers applications." He held aloft three pieces of Autobot sized paper.

"They are requests for a Bumblebee X Sam slash romance"

Bumblebee groaned.

"A Sideswipe and Sunstreaker pointless humor, with a special request for Ratchet"

Ratchet slapped his forehead.

"And an, uh… Optimus X OFC romance. Human of course."

If he weren't made of metal, Ridel would have sworn he was blushing under his facemask.

He cleared his throat and continued. "Where as most writers go through channels," And here he gave Ridel a stern look. "This human came here to plead her case personally. What do you think?"

"Alright fine," Said Ratchet. "If it'll save me another multi chapter twin induced headache I'll do it."

"Aww C'mon doc." Said Sideswipe teasingly.

The room was divided. In the end however, it was decided that the red headed writers idea should be tried. Mrs. Farber was dead against the whole thing, until she realized that, being the internal editor to a girl writing a Transformers fic she would be able to interact with her favorite Autobots almost every day. If the story took a dive, she could always gripe about it with the Autobots who had decided not to be in it.

Ridel gave Optimus a list of the Characters needed, and he sent them the message. Some agreed, and some flat out refused, but in the end Ridel got her cast. Now if she could only keep them until the story was finished…

**AN: 2 (this time it's not AN: 1)**

So what do YOU think? Should I give the story a try? If so, Got any helpful suggestions for the story?

If not, feel free to tell me why. I'm all ears.

Oh and, in case you're wondering what the Billy Blaster and Sparkle Spike thing is about, It's because of the english dub for Transformers Headmasters. Go to youtube and look it up. It's... Bizarre...


End file.
